the hardest part.

I guess the hardest part of things right now is self realization. As I'm typing this I am coming to terms with the fact that my life is in shambles. Now this may sound like a cry for help or some other over dramatic bullshit, but trust me when I say it's not.

I tend to suffer from "Dreamers Disease" while I'm sure it's listed in UrbanDictionary.com, I don't feel like looking it up. Here is my definition. I get too over invested in my projects and put too much of myself in them. Hoping for something almost unreal to happen.
While it is good to believe in yourself, it sucks letting yourself down time after time.

I'm spending the next few weeks not worrying about anything. I'm going to get ready for the Have Heart show, get ready for the Immunity Clothing launch party. Then, that's it. No mailorder, no practice, no writing, no designing. I MIGHT check the Immunity myspace, and I MIGHT check the Anthems page.

I have to get my life straightened out and I need to stop stressing about things that ultimately have no effect on the rest of my life.
Please take note, I am in no way, shape, or form saying that I am quitting my band; that we are breaking up; that i'm going to stop doing shirts; or that I am going to cut all communication.
I am only saying that I will be worrying less about the aforementioned and I am going to focus more on hanging out with my friends, taking care of my pets, hanging with my lovely lady, and cleaning my house.

This decision has been a long time coming, and I almost did something really fucking stupid today (not suicide, don't be gay.) Luckily I have amazing friends who know what to say and how to say it to make me wake up.

Let's hope things can only get better.